Where to even start with 2020?

The year started poorly, my brother told us he had an ‘obstruction’ in his colon and more tests were needed. January was filled with worry, by February we knew it definitely was cancer but were full of hope that it could be beaten. I started sending him dark humour cards, it was the best way we knew how to deal with such crappy news. (Sorry for the swear words mum, but I think they’re justified.) Also, for context, he called the cancer ‘the rat’ and his chemo treatment sent him home each week with a chemo pump in a bumbag, some of these will make more sense now.

In March Covid took over and we went into lockdown, and I wanted to hibernate. I was working part-time and trying to figure out a way to keep my business afloat as all the exciting jobs, weddings and workshops, were steadily postponed and then canceled. Suddenly it was all SO terrifying - Covid and cancer treatments don’t mix. Han went into shielding and didn’t leave the house for months apart from Chemo appointments and hospital trips. I decided to isolate as best I could so that I could continue visiting him.

By April we were getting used to staying at home, we did pub quizzes, walked a lot, dusted off our bikes, I worked, created workbooks, figured out how to do Zoom workshops, and started learning to bake bread… didn’t everyone get a sourdough starter in lockdown?

May, June and July seemed to whizz by in lockdown. My husband was on furlough, we were home-schooling, we did a lot of DIY, painted anything that didn’t move, and tried so hard not to get stressed about the world. I stopped watching the news for a bit, it was just too depressing. Through all of this Han was on a wild ride of Chemo, operations, and hospital stays. Chemo stopped at the end of May, there was little contact from the hospital, and around the end of July we were all getting pretty twitchy because he surely should have had some news about the next stages of treatment by now. So he contacted his consultant, who sounded embarrassed that no-one had been in touch, and before we could blink he was in for an appointment and chemo started again. A different mix of drugs, surely these will work this time? The last lot just made him sicker.

We had happy news too with Han and Sarah getting engaged and then married in August. It was so nice to have some joy in amongst all this doom and gloom. As a honeymoon treat they had an exciting jaunt on some microlights on the most beautiful day of the year, blue skies as far as you could see. I’ve never seen a smile as wide as his when he stepped off the Microlight!

September and October were a further run of hospital trips, chemo, radiotherapy when the chemo didn’t work and a whole lot of worry. We did manage to sneak off for some family time on a canal boat though. It turns out that going straight is the easy bit but you have to turn round at some point! I’m so grateful we had this time as a family bubble. My husband and I celebrated our first wedding anniversary by spending the day apart as I picked Han up from yet another hospital trip. We did manage to bag a delicious meal from 111 by Modou as an anniversary treat though, I highly recommend you try it!

And then it was November, Han was back in the hospital. His wife and I spent a lot of time working with the care team to get him home. We were successful and got him home to spend his last days surrounded by people he loved. We are thankful for the support we received from Marie Curie, Cordia, Macmillan, Cancer Support Scotland, and Maggies. They are a very special bunch who deserve huge praise. The rest of November and December is a bit of a blur, and best that we don’t dwell on it. I’m also thankful for how supportive and understanding everyone has been when I’ve had to postpone classes and push back deadlines as I navigate the last few months.

Being creative has been difficult when my mind has been so full of everything else. Sometimes I just couldn’t get anything done and other times I’ve been glad for the creative distraction. Despite the terrible year, there have been some really lovely jobs I’ve worked on and I appreciate all the people who have chosen to work with me, or place commissions. You’ve helped keep this gal sane, and you’ve kept my business going over a truly awful year, so thank you.

Here are just a few photos of some of these jobs…

It’s been a bit of a shaky, though not unexpected, start to 2021. Another lockdown but the good news is the vaccine is coming. For now we need to stay safe, remember that by doing so we are protecting other peoples’ vulnerable relatives and keeping ourselves healthy. There will be some sunshine in all of this, and we will be able to meet up again soon… I hope.

Stay safe, hug your bubbles hard and be kind to each other.

Big Love,

Jen xx

Well , That Was A Year Huh.